Gashlycrumb Tinies – Re-written…


Who doesn’t love Edward Gorey’s “Gashlycrumb Tinies?” Alphabetized deaths of unfortunate children…well, here’s a rewrite using some more “modern” names of children (a couple of names have stayed the same), and though the manners of death have changed, the original rhyme scheme has  remained the same. To view Gorey’s original masterpiece, click  here And here goes…

A is for Ava, who took too many dares;

B is for Brendan, buried in housewares;

C is for Charlotte, dumped into a bay;

D is for Daxton, who singed under the rays;

E is for Ethan, who overclimbed his reach;

F is for Faith, buried on a beach;

G is for Gavin, drank from the wrong mug;

H is for Harold,  mauled by a pug;

I is for Isla, who tripped on a rake;

J is for Jack, who smothered on cake;

K is for Kylie,  stumbled on the tracks;

L is for Lincoln, who became too lax;

M is for Mia, who had blood in her pee;

N is for Nathan, who fell from a tree;

O is for Olive, dispatched by her doll;

P is for Phoenix, clubbed in a stall;

Q is for Quentin, trapped in some tires;

R is for Raven, trampled by the choir

S is for Skylar, done in by drill bits;

T is for Tristan, clawed by fox kits;

U is for Una, pecked by a crane;

V is for Vincent, drowned in the rain;

W is for Willow, choked on some rice;

X is for Xander, slipped on some ice;

Y is for Yul, who was locked in a bin;

and Z is for Zoe, who is now “fin.”


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